I've been on complete voice rest for 2 whole weeks. It's driving me crazy. Everyone except one of the people I sing with has been fantastic about this. I'm grateful that one friend in particular is back, as she's filling in on my church gig for me. Sigh. I'm still tired. Will finish my thoughts tomorrow.

We finally got power back - Central NY was hit pretty heavily by an ice storm this weekend, so I had a forced tv deprivation (except for the little handheld tv a family member brought over on Saturday night for the big SU game - go SU!). I didn’t miss television at all! We couldn’t go outside for a bit due to falling branches - no damage to the house or cars, thank goodness. We only lost 3 trees and a whole lotta limbs - minor compared to everyone else. And even though the sump pump couldn’t do its job, we only had to bail out the cistern a few times - with the only pitcher small enough to fit that was handy: a carnivalware pitcher. (the colored shiny glassware that you find in antique stores!)



I didn’t have a real artist’s date, but I did have some nice quiet time due to all this, which was much needed - not only for my health, but for artistic reflection. I also got a start on Elisir, which I’ve been wanting to do for some time now. This whole weekend made me realize that although I have been taking time for me, I *haven’t* been taking time for me, if you know what I mean. It was *real* quiet time. It encouraged me to think about a retreat - religious or otherwise. I’m not sure yet. I just have this feeling there are some things in the back of my brain that I need to think through that aren’t coming out in the morning pages yet.

The ENT was fabulous - didn’t charge me for being a “new” patient (I saw him when he was in another group of otolaryngologists - sp?), nor did I need to be scoped, so I only paid for the office visit, and not the $400+ I had expected. Yay! Turns out I have something that is in the same family of viruses as mono. Am now on Zithromax, salt water gargle, no talking, and bed rest! No lesson till next week, and then, no arias or MT/job related stuff - I need to bring in “Come Ready and See Me”. Anything else of that level that you all like to sing are welcome suggestions!

The medical end of things: on hearing me, my teacher said not to even hum until about Wednesday, and the doctor referred me to the ENT - I now have an appointment on Friday to get scoped. Expensive, but worth it. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

I agree with whomever said that it gets harder the higher you move up the ladder in the business. I guess that’s why I love the educational programs I’m doing so much - the immediate contact with a very enthusiastic audience (even if they are telling the Giant where Jack is hiding in the house)! Nursing homes and senior centers are always a soul satisfying place to sing - and you don’t just need to sing “the oldies”. The seniors I usually sing for love it when I throw in something they haven’t heard before, as they tell me: “It keeps my mind growing!” I find these types of performances really keep me grounded.



My personal check in:



I’ve been felled by illness this week - probably not doing NATS, which I’m bummed about. I really feel/felt pretty good about it this time. (I usually freak out about competitions, but really felt like I was ready to move beyond my comfort zone this time!). AW has fallen by the wayside, and I have no excuse other than dealing with massive amounts of post-nasal drip (that’s what I get for not using the neti pot lately!) I’m determined to get back on track. With everything. I’ve been using my down time to catch up on the business end of things - thanks to all for the resume tips!.

I still can't believe I finally have one of the leads in a production with an opera company!!! Well, not *the* lead, but a major role. I'll be playing Anne Ergeman in A Little Night Music with Oswego Opera!! The same director as Magic Flute, and some wonderful people to be on stage with. I've been told that I'm perfect for the part - I've kicked the weight loss into high gear - no way will I be going onstage at this weight wearing all white!! I'll look like an elephant. I need to lose the weight for my health, anyways. At least it's coming off in a healthy manner this time.


It seems so silly to be focused on this, though, when the whole world is falling apart. I'm grateful for every chance I have to be onstage, practicing my craft, but what does it mean in the grand scheme of things? I had an interesting conversation with an exchange student that stayed with our family. I believe it's important to get different perspectives and not just buy into everything we get through the media. Sometimes lately I wish we could take an isolationist stance. I'm tired of hearing that help is needed from the US and then hearing that we are too imperialistic a country. I agree that American brands should stay out of things - part of what makes this world a special place is all the differences you find - I'd hate to see any culture or language disappear due to the influx of another culture. That's just plain wrong. I think it suprised my friend when I made that statement. I believe we should all be there for each other - we need to help the starving and poor of the world - share knowledge, but not force our way of life on each other. But how does that fit in with removing dirtbags like Hitler, Hussein and bin Laden. People like that don't deserve to be in power. I get mad seeing pictures of all the palaces - what is it - 6? - that Hussein has and then the conditions of the poor in his country. Stop whining about how the US is keeping 'your' people oppressed and take care of them, for pete's sake! You're willing to destroy the people of Iraq and say that we are at fault? I don't think so. Take a look in the mirror.


I don't know. I'm beginning to blather - need sleep.

Wow - things are really beginning to pick up. I've been asked to join another troupe whose focus is educational outreach. Fun, and a good way to pick up extra cash without subbing. I'd rather be performing than teaching in a classroom any day, if I have the choice. I'd rather be happy at what I'm doing and not, as some people do, work just to get a paycheck. There's no point in getting paid if you feel like it's combat pay, or have to pay a doctor to cure you of stress-related diseases. The new gig really helped when it's been tough to even get accepted to audition, let alone a YAP any more. So I've really begun digging through Opera America and finding the smaller opera companies that will take singers like me and give them a chance. I supposed I'm bummed about the YAP thingy because Minnesota, Cincinnati and Cleveland all don't have room for any more sopranos. People are thrilled when they see me onstage, but in an audition situation.......Got to do something. First things first - get the darned recital overwith so I can feel like I can get on with my life!!!!!